Friday, October 20, 2017

Arrogant Dance Snobs

Nobody in our dance world on Oahu is that bad. The only difference is that arrogant dancers try to hide their anxiety about screwing up by presenting "perfection" and "confidence", while insecure dancers apologize constantly as a way to explain why they’re so "bad". That is why social dancers try really, really hard to not get angry at "arrogant" dancers. None of us are perfect. What has helped most of us has been the awareness, and conscious avoidance of default behaviors when we feel anxious.

“Social dancers know that the job of feet is walking, but the real joy is dancing.”  

Granted, not every arrogant dancer suffers from anxiety. Some legitimately just think they’re amazing (whether or not they actually are). Mostly it applies to competition and exhibition dancers. But, we prefer to give people who appear arrogant the benefit of the doubt. Whether you’d like to do the same is up to you. we’ve seen (and had) a lot of different reactions to anxiety. Not all show up as arrogance. So we are not clones we are all separate individuals.

"Tiny Bubbles" by Don Ho

Social dancers understand the desire to ‘look capable’ in workshops and dancing. It has been one of the things that we struggled with most – especially when some begin transitioning from intermediate social dancer to more advanced dancing. From experience, we can also say that it’s possible to manage the anxiety – even if it never goes away. We can still get anxious when we are in the position of "student", and struggle with the need to "prove" ourselves on the ballroom dance floor.

"Walk With Me Through Paradise" by Melveen Leed

What is life?
Life is living in this moment, experiencing and experimenting but experience isn’t life. -- Life is reflecting and meditating but reflection isn’t life. -- Life is helping and guiding but philanthropy isn’t life. -- Life is eating and drinking but food isn’t life. -- Life is reading and dancing but art isn’t life. -- Life is kissing and pleasuring but sex isn’t life. -- Life is winning and losing but competition isn’t life. -- Life is loving and caring but love isn’t life. -- Life is birthing and nurturing but children aren’t life. -- Life is letting go and surrendering but death isn’t life. -- Life is all these things but all these things aren’t life. --- Life is always more.”
 ― Kamand Kojouri